Notes
The second time I utilized it was my first date with Chantle Edillor.
The BDSMR checklist stands for Boundaries, Desires, STDs (or STIs), Meaning, and Relationships, serving as a structured conversation framework to promote conscious consent and soulful connection before sexual intimacy. It ensures partners honor each other's personal limits, explicit wants, health status, emotional intentions, and relational context to foster safety and depth.This acronym guides pre-intimacy discussions, starting with clear boundaries (physical/emotional limits), followed by desires (mutual turn-ons and fantasies), STD/STI disclosure (recent testing/history), meaning (spiritual/emotional purpose of the encounter), and relationships (monogamy status or partner agreements). Variations like RBDSMA(T/F) expand it to include Relationship status, Aftercare, or Traumas, as seen in related conscious relating tools.While no direct blog posts or writings by Shachar Caspi explicitly detail BDSMR, the concept aligns with his work in somatic and relational practices through schools like Art of Love/NATIV, emphasizing sacred sexuality and transformative workshops. An Instagram reference from 2019 describes BDSMR in this exact context, likely tied to his teachings shared via podcasts like Shannon Algeo's, though public written documentation remains scarce.
