Three days after her adoption, Piper and I arrived at Moto Club di Santa Monica for a post-purchase mechanical checkup where Jessica accosted us with her aggressive stance. Her last boyfriend, a pro surfer, was full of excuses and unable to satisfy her needs; at that moment—so was I. "She's too much bike for me," I responded when the proprietor saw the obvious glint in my eye, "maybe in a few years" I murmured to myself. Visit after visit, as the aged Piper needed more and more repairs, Jessica remained. It was as if no one could step up to match her character and confidence. Then, on June 30th, Piper was stolen. My third call, after the police and insurance, was to Moto Club to ask if Jessica was still sitting in their showroom. The conversation went:
ME: "It's Brian. My Monster just got stolen." MC: "Oh no!" ME: "I know, sucks. Do you still have the Streetfighter?" MC: "Yea, someone is trying to buy it right now but... (whispers)... we don't think his line of credit is going to be approved." ME: "I'll be there in twenty minutes."
Arriving twenty minutes later as the failed suitor was leaving, I put down a deposit down while I transferred the full funds to bring Jessica home. Two days later, I arrived to pickup my bae. After the arduous chore of escaping Moto Club without them pressuring you to purchase everything they can sell you, we went for lunch (aka 'me scarfing down food without breaking eye-contact and counting the seconds until my key brought her thunderous roar back to life'). Being cautious through traffic as we ventured home, it wasn't until Washington Blvd. that we found some empty road where Jessica could... show me her legs. Up until this point, Jessica was casually named 'Piper2' in honor of the recently lost @Piper. The light tuned green, we jumped on the throttle, and—early into third gear—we found ourselves doing 75MPH in a 35MPH zone... but with her race suspension, it felt like 40MPH. It was at this moment that I knew "Piper" was too peppy and friendly of a name for this powerful beauty; she'd prooven herself to be something entirely different. She was tall(er than Piper)... and a redhead... BOOM, Jessica Rabbit. As it happens, the fictional characters Jessica Jones, Jessica Sanders (Heroes), and @Jessica (TrueBlood) share the same character... "sexy, sultry, and slightly murderous" as is my Jessica. BRIAN'S NOTE: It was later pointed out to me that Jessica Chastain also fit the bill of spunky redhead with a questionable glint of murder, but she didn't inspire the name.
References
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- #jessica_swichkow